After living in my yellow ’72 VW Beetle for a little over a week, I moved back into my parent’s house temporarily. At that time my dad had some heavy drinking problems and my mom was dealing with a an illness called Lupus.
Lupus is a terminal illness that worsens when the patient is under stress, so his drinking made it worse. It was a vicious circle, he was stressed because of her illness and she was stressed because of his drinking. Neither knew how to communicate it with assertiveness.
I’m not justifying anyone’s actions, but this is how I see it now with a calmer heart and from a more neutral stand point.
The stay at my parent’s was supposed to last a couple of months; time enough to save some rent and credit card money.
What was supposed to be a couple of months turned into nine and things did not improve at my parent’s. His drinking worsened, she was wasn’t getting any better. The credit card companies were harassing me on a daily basis, the pressure was more than I could handle.
Me and my dad would be fighting all the time, which of course was not good for my mom. so instead of being part of the solution I was being part of the problem. Back then, my younger brother was also living with my parents, and we got into each other’s nerves all the time also.
It felt like I couldn’t get a break! But it had it had its good moments also. I had the opportunity to spend more time with my mom before she passed away. We’d have lunch and converse, I’d bring my daughter over the days that I had her and she’d get to know her grandma and they played on the swing set whenever my mom was feeling good enough to leave her bed.
I finally saved enough to rent a small apartment and moved out again.
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